I often focus on how to stop unwanted items coming into our homes but I’ve been reminded by my lovely community of the challenges that occur when letting go of treasures nobody wants.
It’s a tough situation that many of us experience that can stir up feelings of sadness, frustration, or even guilt. The knee-jerk reaction might be to keep the item, thinking, “If they don’t want it, I’ll keep it!”
But is that really helping the situation—or you?
If your feeling stuck:
- Reflect on why you’re letting it go. Take a moment to think about the reason you decided to part with the item in the first place. Has that reason changed? Often, the decision to let go is rooted in the desire to create more space, reduce clutter, or prioritise your wellness. Holding onto the item after deciding to release it may only prolong the emotional weight it carries.
- Appreciate their honesty. If your loved one says, “No thanks,” take a moment to be grateful for their strong emotional boundaries. This isn’t a reflection on you or what the item represents. It’s simply their way of saying, “I can’t manage more right now”. This is often not an easy thing to say.
Most of us do our best to let others know that it’s not about rejecting the person or their love—it’s about being realistic with what we can handle. We all have different coping levels when it comes to ‘stuff,’ and those levels can change, especially during stressful times.
- Check in with yourself. Are you placing more emphasis on the item than on your own well-being? It’s natural to feel some loss when parting with something tied to memories or family history, but the memories stay with you, not the item.
Navigating this tricky situation.
Here are a few suggestions to help release the physical item:
- Capture the memory: Take a photo of the item and write about a memory it evokes. This will help keep the emotional connection without holding on to the physical object.
- Change the way you think about the release. Think about it as giving the item the opportunity to benefit someone else or that it has served its purpose.
Managing any emotions that arise.
Letting go can feel heavy (I talk about my experience in this 2016 blog). It’s okay to acknowledge the mix of gratitude, guilt, and even grief that comes with it. Allowing yourself to feel these emotions is part of the process, but don’t let them keep you stuck.
Every time you make a decision about what leaves your home, you’re creating space for a life that supports you now—one that reflects your values and priorities (which hopefully includes your wellness!).
You’re not alone in navigating these tricky decisions. Most of us are learning how to balance memories, sustainability, and the need for simplicity.
Don’t delay, start today
Sara
